- Jaz, where do you want your makeup and stuff?
- What are you doing?
- Don't know, just memories.
- That's a very sweaty memory.
- My mum asked if you could put the kettle on.
- Give it here!
- No!
- You've got to...
- No!
I don't appear in this memory!
Cut!
Don't know, just memories.
- That's a very sweaty memory.
- My mum asked if you could put the kettle on.
No!
I don't appear in this memory!
Cut!
The car's three minutes away.
Remember, you've got that leftover lasagna in the fridge.
- Where exactly are you going again?
- A friend's house.
- I can help you with your stuff.
- It's fine.
- Stupid.
- OK.
- It's not just about the hair.
I mean, you've had long hair for--
you've always-- if you didn't like it, then--
- I thought you liked it.
- I just don't understand why you'd want to--
to your-- I mean, you've said stuff to me,
that I've made you feel--
- What?
- Good about your chest.
- It's here.
- Just wait.
You're beautiful.
All right?
I want you to know that.
- I do.
- What?
- Just not in the way everyone else wants me to be, OK?
Forget it.
No, I'm trying to--
I mean, I want to give you a compliment.
- I didn't ask to have these, OK?
Let's just leave it at that.
- But, Jaz, you've got--
I love your--
- Yeah, hi.
Yeah, sorry.
- I don't understand why--
- I'm sorry.
- --you'd want to--
- I hate them.
They're nothing to do with me.
Yeah, I'm about to come out.
- But you've said to me--
- Yeah, well I didn't know I was allowed.
- What?
- To not want to be a girl.
The car's here.
- Do--
- Forget it.
- Do you not want to be a girl?
- Forget it.
- Do you-- do you want to be a boy?
So why?
Why-- why don't you want to be a girl?
- Because I'm not.
- You are.
I mean, you've got-- you've got a--
- Don't matter.
I'm not.
I know I'm not.
- OK, well-- since the--
how long have you?
- Since I was 12.
- What have we been doing for the past three years then?
- That's not--
- Every time that you said that you've
been happy, that's been--
- No!
- I see.
This is something that I've done, isn't it?
- No, it's nothing to do with you.
- If I've not been enough of a man to--
- No!
- --please.
Oh, all right.
If you don't want to be a girl, why not become a boy?
- Why?
- 'Cause.
- Go on.
Why should I?
- 'Cause people expect you to be one or the other.
- Why?
- 'Cause that's what everyone is.
Well, at least that's what you get told, everyone is.
- So?
- So there must be a reason.
- And what if everyone's just copying everyone else?
And I never loved you because you're a man, OK?
- Wait, Jaz, look, if you want more attention--
is that what the hair's about?
Is it?
- No.
- Then why?
- Do you have any clue what this past week's been like for me?
The day I got this done, I was shouted
at three times in the street.
But the 45 minutes before that was the happiest
I've felt in the past--
You're a kid, and you can do what you want.
You can just be you.
And then suddenly for no reason you
have to wear a skirt, jewellery, makeup.
You're a girl, this is how you should look.
This is how you should dress.
This is how you should stand.
And no one-- no one asks if you want to.
No one tells you why.
Here's how you shave your armpits and your legs.
And, by the way, you're gonna have to do this forever.
Shopping!-- men's, women's.
Over there, miss.
What?
You want to try on a suit?
Really?
Are you sure about that?
Don't worry about those men shouting at you from their van.
That guy's just paying you a compliment.
You should be grateful you've got such a nice--
So I cut my hair.
So what?
And you just reacted the same as everyone else.
- I didn't.
- You didn't want to know.
- If you'd just talk to me.
- I've been trying.
- How many times have we talked about difficult stuff?
- I've tried to talk to you about it.
I really have to--
- OK, OK.
So tell me.
- What?
- Why?
Why was it the best 45 minutes of your life?
'Cause I finally feel more--
more like I'm not hiding or performing
or pretending for anyone else.
I'm just-- I'm just me.
I'm just me.
It's like coming up for air.
Do you realise how little I want to walk out that door right
now?
- What if you don't fancy me anymore?
- I do.
- You're gonna meet people who understand you and this,
like I can't.
And then you're probably gonna fall for someone--
- What?
- Someone that I can't be.
- Where did you--
- Or people are gonna--
They're gonna think that I'm--
I just don't know how to--
- Me either.
It's OK.
- So are you--
I don't know the right word.
- There's lots of, erm--
Trans, queer, gender fluid.
I like non-binary.
- Non-binary, like--
- It feels right for me.
- So not a boy or a girl?
Like a grey area?
- It's all the colours.
It's not grey, it's all the colours.
- Where were you gonna go again?
- A friend's house.
- Which friend?
- It doesn't matter.
- Jaz?
- I didn't know where I was gonna go, OK?
I don't know how anyone's gonna--
- What?
- React!
But people love you.
- They love Jasmine.
I don't know if they're gonna--
- --Love who?
- Jasmine's a girl's name.
- Why do we even have girls' and boys' names?
It just puts you in a box right from the start doesn't it?
It's shafting anyone who's--
so I mean, have you--
- I thought maybe you could--
- picked a--
- --help me.
- Who else have you told?
- You're the first person.
- What about your parents?
- They'll be fine.
- Like you were?
- Well I am now.
Well, I'm gonna be.
- I just want them to get me.
- What's me?
- What do you mean?
- Tell me.
What's me?
- I'm funny.
- You are funny.
- Oi!
- No, you are, what else?
- I really like vegetables.
There so good.
No one understands.
And I like standing behind the goal at football matches.
And I like cats, even though I'm allergic to them.
I really like thrash metal, and tiny birds, and rugs.
And I'm looking forward to my eyesight
going so I can wear glasses.
And--
- And?
- And I like you, when you're not being an idiot.
- OK, OK.
So OK-- so takeaway?
- Pizza?
- Not pizza.
- What?
- I'm joking, we can have pizza.
And telly?
- Can't we just talk some more?
I just-- I want to understand more.
- Yeah.
I'd like that.